One Wedding Night... Page 14

  “I have to admit it’s been an experience I’ll never forget, but fun, too. Actually, they’ve been a lot easier to handle than I thought. They’ve hardly noticed that Ashley and Ryder aren’t here.”

  “Thankfully everything went well with Ashley’s delivery.” They’d received a call the first night that Ashley had delivered a healthy baby boy, but since the infant came into the world under five pounds, the pediatrician tending him wanted to keep him a couple of extra days. That meant that Ashley would be staying also. Jake had asked Lynn if everything was okay at home. When she’d assured him they were fine and the babies were okay, he’d told Lynn that they’d all stay in San Antonio until the baby was released.

  “I know Ryder’s relieved. And with you taking care of the girls, he can focus his attention on Ashley and the new baby. What did they name him?”

  Lynn turned her head toward him. Her gaze connected with his, and her heart suddenly stopped beating. His mouth was only inches from her own. “Um, what?” she asked, feeling a little disoriented.

  Russ lost his train of thought, forgetting what he’d asked. His hands stilled on her shoulders as he gazed into her eyes. Her lips parted, and he could no longer fight his attraction to her. He’d kept his hands off of her like he’d promised, but it had been sheer hell in the interim.

  He sucked in a hard breath as she turned her body more toward him and leaned closer. His mouth came down on hers as her hands started an exploration of their own, beginning by touching his face, then, as she twisted around to him, sliding down his neck and shoulders. He deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue past the barrier of her teeth, and she climbed into his lap to get closer to him.

  Russ grunted as she straddled him, settling her rear against him, setting him on fire. Slipping his hand between them, he touched her breast, then felt the bud of her nipple as it became erect.

  His breathing became hard as their passion escalated, and Russ combed his hands through her hair and cupped the back of her head as his tongue made a foray into her mouth. She whimpered, then pressed closer, her hips moving against his already burgeoning sex.

  Russ lifted his mouth, trying hard to breathe and to keep his sense of reason. “I promised not to touch you,” he rasped.

  “I want you to touch me,” Lynn whispered back, and her hands went to the buttons of his shirt.

  He grabbed her wrists, holding them tight and stilling her movements. They stared at each other in stunned silence.

  “Are you sure?” It cost him to ask, but he had to know that she really wanted this to happen between them, that she wouldn’t be sorry later.

  “Yes.”

  She followed up the simple answer by leaning forward and kissing his chin, then running her tongue along his cheek, planting more kisses on his skin as she made a path to his ear.

  “Damn, Lynn, you’re killing me.”

  She smiled, a cute little smile that made him want to take her right then and there. Instead, he scooted to the edge of the sofa and stood. Lynn squealed, then wrapped her legs around his waist.

  “I want you naked and in bed. All night.” Russ carried her through the house to Deke’s room where she’d been sleeping. She continued to plant enticing kisses on his mouth until they reached the bed. He lowered her until her feet touched the floor, then they shed their clothes in a frenzied rush. They fell together in a tumble of arms and legs on the bed, and Russ moved over her, aligning their bodies.

  He braced himself above her with his elbows, then touched his tongue to her breast, kissing it, then sucking the nipple into his mouth as he caressed her other breast with his hand.

  Lynn’s hips moved rhythmically as his hand slipped between her legs, and he touched her intimately. She was hot and wet, ready for him, and his erection grew harder. He was poised and ready to enter her when he stopped.

  “Hold on,” he whispered, then stretched across the bed to the floor where he’d dropped his pants. He yanked out his wallet and flipped it open. In his hurried movements to get the one condom he had tucked in it, the contents spilled onto the floor. After a moment, Russ returned to her, settling himself between her legs.

  Ready for him, Lynn locked her legs around him as he came into her, her back arching as his hands slid beneath her buttocks. He plunged harder, deeper. Her hands moved across his back, then her fingers tightened, pinching his skin as she cried out with pleasure. He climaxed only moments later, falling into a dark void.

  Eleven

  Russ came awake slowly. He rolled to his side and reached for Lynn, then opened his eyes when he realized she wasn’t there. He shouldn’t have been surprised, he guessed, to discover he was in bed alone.

  But, dammit, he was.

  Surprised and disappointed.

  Was it because Lynn already regretted what had happened between them last night? Or was she merely going through the ritual of getting the babies up and dressed for the day?

  He’d rather believe the latter, but doubts plagued him. Surely by now she realized the same thing he did…during the night they’d had unprotected sex, which basically put them right back where they’d started. Swearing under his breath, he climbed out of the bed. He quickly located his jeans and underwear and slid them on, then reached for his shirt.

  He went in search of Lynn and found her and the babies in the kitchen. He stood silently at the door and watched her as she moved about the room. She was good with the girls. She’d seen to their every need, automatically knowing what to do for each of them as if they were her own. He could easily see her mothering her own child.

  His child.

  Russ silently cursed, telling himself he was a fool if he let down his guard around Lynn. Sure she enjoyed his lovemaking, but that was all there was between them. And that’s the way he wanted it to be, wasn’t it? It was the only way he knew to protect his heart. He’d trusted his heart to a woman before, and had been hurt by her betrayal. He wasn’t going to give Lynn that kind of power over him.

  He should have learned his lesson the hard way, but it seemed his desire for Lynn had taken over his common sense, and he was constantly having to refocus. They made love several times during the night. He’d protected Lynn the first time with the only condom he’d had. He’d convinced himself that he could be satisfied with making love to her only once. And dammit, he probably would have if she hadn’t curled against his body afterward.

  Holding her against him had been his undoing. Before they’d fallen asleep, they’d begun touching, which led to kissing, which led to him burying himself inside her so fast that they’d both climaxed within moments. It had felt natural and right, and sex with Lynn had satisfied him beyond his imagination.

  The third time, he awakened with her sprawled all over him and any sense of responsibility had been nonexistent. Never in his life had he felt so over-whelmed with emotion, so deep a desire for a woman that he couldn’t think straight.

  Not just any woman.

  Just Lynn.

  Hell.

  He quietly walked up to her and stood behind her, then touched her shoulders. She squealed, then dropped the knife in her hand and spun around.

  “Russ!”

  “Who’d you think it was?” he teased, loving the soft pink flush that rose to her cheeks. He bent to kiss her, and she raised herself on the tip of her toes to meet him. Russ slid his arms around her back and held her against him.

  “I just didn’t hear you,” Lynn whispered, and her heart skipped a beat. She hadn’t expected him to be so open with affection. It both surprised and pleased her. “I’m about ready to feed the girls,” she said. “Wanna help?”

  “Sure.” Russ reached around her for a piece of pancake that she hadn’t yet cut into tiny bite-size pieces and popped it into his mouth.

  “I made coffee if you want some.” She pointed to the other end of the counter. Russ didn’t let her go, and she cocked her head and looked at him. “You know, those two aren’t going to wait much longer,” she pointed out, nodding towar
d the twins secured in high chairs near the table.

  “Yeah, I know.” Reluctantly, Russ released her and walked over to pour himself a cup of hot coffee.

  Lynn traced his movements with her gaze as she put two small plates of pancake pieces in front of the girls, then turned her attention to them. Each baby squealed in their own special way as they grabbed bites of pancake and stuffed them in their mouths. She glanced back at Russ, who was stirring sugar into his cup.

  She was glad he hadn’t brought up their night of lovemaking and how it had compromised their situation. Up an hour ahead of him, she’d checked on the babies and had found them still sleeping. Hurrying, she’d had just enough time to shower and change before she’d heard them awaken. By the time she’d gotten to their room, they were both wide awake and itching to get up. While changing them, she’d tried to analyze her feelings. She’d come up with every rationalization imaginable, and finally she’d admitted the truth to herself.

  She’d fallen in love with Russ.

  Hopelessly, desperately in love with him.

  She wasn’t sure he would be all that happy about it if she admitted it to him. Sure, he was attracted to her, but she also knew he felt trapped into this situation by circumstances over which he had no control. If he’d had the opportunity to choose this path, she knew in her heart that he wouldn’t have chosen to be with her.

  He still insisted that they should stay married long enough to stop the townsfolk from gossiping and after a reasonable amount of time, they could get an annulment.

  Divorce.

  Lynn swallowed hard as an unexpected ache centered in her chest. A annulment was no longer an option, was it? They would have to get a divorce. Her heart wanted to believe that maybe Russ could love her, that maybe she could be the woman to claim his heart.

  Maybe if they spent this time together living as man and wife, he would want to stay married. It was possible, right?

  She vowed to enjoy the next couple of days with him and see where it would lead. If a broken heart was in her future, she’d deal with that when it came around. She was going to seize this opportunity to be with Russ, to enjoy loving him, and maybe, just maybe, he’d fall in love with her, too.

  As Lynn had hoped, the next two days went by with her and Russ enjoying each other’s company. They played with the twins, who seemed to be energy-filled little humans. Russ had been busy, leaving for a few hours to see to things at their ranch because they’d already started housing the horses that Jake and Ryder had given them. He’d also checked on the men taking care of the Bar M, seeing to its smooth operation, then returned by dinnertime. By the time Michelle and Melissa were in bed for the evening, Lynn and Russ were more than ready for some time alone.

  Russ hadn’t said a word about their lack of birth control the first night they’d been together, but he’d been sure to let her know that he’d picked up some protection. Lynn had nodded and smiled, then welcomed him into her arms. Their time alone was spent mostly in bed. After putting the babies to bed, they’d only left Deke’s room for food. They’d grabbed snacks and fed each other as they watched a little television, then inevitably they’d start kissing and touching and end up making love.

  Unfortunately their time together came to an abrupt end when they got a phone call from Jake. He reported that Ashley and the baby were being released from the hospital, and they would be arriving home before dusk. Lynn tidied the house, and she and Russ tended to the babies and had them fed and bathed by the time their parents got there.

  The newest McCall was welcomed with wide, inquisitive eyes by his older sisters. Michelle and Melissa, though curious about the tiny infant, actually seemed more interested in vying for Ashley and Ryder’s attention. Unlike his sisters, the baby, named Taylor Mitchell, had the McCall blond hair and the same blue eyes as his father.

  Lynn and Russ had cooked dinner for everyone, and for a while they sat around the table to discuss the details of the infant’s birth. Ryder quickly reported that he’d made it through Taylor’s entire birth process without fainting, as if he’d thought that it would help him live down the fact that he’d passed out in the delivery room when the twins were born. Lynn and Russ also got a thorough briefing on the neonatal care the tiny infant had received at the hospital. Once everything had settled down and their services were no longer needed, Lynn and Russ decided to leave and go home.

  Yet, as they walked back into their own house, a strange and unwelcome tension filled the air between them. While they had talked and teased and entertained each other during their stay at the McCall ranch, they said little as they returned to their real world.

  The reminder that they’d slept in separate bedrooms only days ago was blatant evidence of their true relationship. Lynn had decided not to make an issue of it, hoping that they’d become more comfortable around each other as the evening progressed.

  Russ, however, felt altogether differently. He was sure that nothing between them had changed except that they’d made love. Lynn was still the same woman who had wanted her freedom only days ago. Though he wanted her to share his bed, he realized that he had no right to expect her to. Sure he could seduce her and make love to her, and they could play at being happy together for a while, but eventually she’d blame him for holding her back, for stealing her dreams.

  He couldn’t do that to her, or to himself. He wasn’t the man for her, couldn’t give her the love and devotion that she deserved. It was his pride that kept her locked into their marriage. He’d have to swallow it and let her go.

  Also, he was cognizant of the fact that they hadn’t discussed the possibility of her being pregnant either. It was an issue that lay before them, and whether they wanted to face it or not, it had to be discussed.

  He started to confront her, but stopped when she looked at him, her blue eyes questioning. “I’ll go check on the horses,” he said, stalling for time.

  “Sure.” She didn’t offer to go with him.

  Nodding, he turned and walked out the back door. Lynn watched him leave, and her heart sank. They’d crossed a line in their relationship, one it seemed Russ had no trouble ignoring during the past few days when he’d made love to her but apparently felt he must adhere to now that they were alone.

  She waited for a while for him to return, wanting so much to talk to him. But it soon became apparent to her that he wasn’t coming in. Finally, she gave up and went to bed, hoping that he’d join her, but knowing in her heart that he wasn’t going to.

  Three weeks went by and most of those hours they spent apart. Russ left early to see to the business of running the McCall ranch, then returned later in the day to help with chores at home. Lynn spent the mornings feeding the horses and raking out their stalls, then turned to the business of training. While once just being around them gave her such joy, the horses were now a reminder of what they were going to eventually cost her.

  Her heart.

  She and Russ were sharing a house, but it wasn’t a home. They were raising horses, training them, but Russ didn’t consider them his. She loved her new home, but it didn’t belong to her. Everything she ever wanted was now within her grasp, except her heart’s desire—Russ’s love.

  He had called earlier and told her he’d be late getting back due to a sick animal at the Bar M. Keeping his dinner warm, she waited hours for him to return, wanting to talk, to get it all out in the open. She heard his truck pull up to the house, and her heart lurched. She’d half expected him to remain distant as he’d been over the past few weeks.

  Instead, he stepped into the kitchen and walked over to the sink. He scrubbed his hands, then taking a towel from a rack on the wall, he dried them, then tossed the towel aside as he turned to look at her.

  “We need to talk, Lynn.”

  Lynn started. Though she’d wanted to talk, his tone sent icy shivers down her spine. She didn’t want to hear what he had to say, yet there was no turning back. It was time for her to face the inevitable.

  He eithe
r loved her or he didn’t.

  She drew a deep breath and looked at him. His face was unreadable, and it was as if the man she’d made love with no longer existed. “All right.”

  His lips thinned. “I know you could be pregnant. I should have protected you,” he stated bluntly, not beating around the bush.

  “It’s just as much my fault.” She didn’t want him to blame himself. “I’m just as responsible.”

  Russ glared at her, his frustration mounting. “You said before that you could tell if you were pregnant from a pregnancy test.”

  She nodded. “Yes.”

  “I think we should get one as soon as possible.” Though he’d told her that he wanted to stay married to her until the town had no reason to gossip about them, he knew it wasn’t possible. His pride be damned, he couldn’t go on living with her without touching her.

  “Sure. I’ll get one,” she told him, and her tone was sharper than she’d intended. “Catherine asked me to go to San Luis with her to pick up some things that Ashley needs. I’ll slip away and get a test while I’m there.”

  “All right.” That decided, Russ moved away from the counter, then stopped in front of her. “If you’re not pregnant, I’ll give you what you want. I won’t keep you here any longer.”

  “What?” Lynn’s heart twisted with pain.

  “You never wanted any of this,” he stated roughly, “and neither did I. I trapped you into it, trapped us both into it. I know I insisted on staying together, but that was my pride talking,” he admitted candidly.

  He doesn’t love you.

  The stabbing pain in Lynn’s heart grew sharper, stealing her ability to breathe. “But I thought—”

  “What? That we’d try to make something more of this?” He waved his hand in the air, then rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m not what you want, Lynn,” he said, trying to make her face the truth. “Sure, we’re great in bed together, but that doesn’t change anything.”